Avoiding the Machine
But it hurts my time. I’m 2 minutes late or 30 minutes slow. My cell phone dies from checking the digital clock, not from calls. Last night I thought if I’d started 1 year ago, I might have a successful platform today. I almost lose the bigger dream. Though setting short term goals like walking the dog is more simple, it’s been difficult to want to do what I need the most. When dying seems so close I work harder, harder. And what forces my mind into wisdom, makes it slow. I made myself a commodity somewhere between submission and publication (death). Even I believe my only value comes from what I can produce quickly. Meanwhile, the hope to maintain quality has consumed me with burden. I’ve thrown my person into a one-man assembly line. My worth contained in the next completed piece, I wonder if it will float. If I’ll find my value is 0.
the last paragraph is so eerily related to my current state.
the marxist stuff gets pretty good.
it's interesting how you turn these dreams of dying into this drive to work harder and harder. i see wealth and success in your future young lady
~W (negation of Wealth)
Angela…i regret i have not been back sooner, but there is no "lack of support" from this peer!!!!!It is empowering somehow to me to see the inspired comments left to you by your readers…it assures me i am correct in realizing your strength of pen and courage of heart…your reflections offer TRUE insight into what you go through, and even if the words were unintelligible (even if you didn't say "i shorten my explanations accordingly" – though you are talking about conversation, it seems true of these recents posts, too)- even without this, i feel i would still gain a sense of mood through sentence structure, and a sense of urgency.Some will call you gifted, I am sure you are tha gift…thank you Angelamtp
Mic,I apologize for moving your comment–I was mistaken that it was disapproved (in which it would be a loss for many who didn't have a chance to read your notes of inspiration).Something I thoroughly appreciate is your talent for reading, there is a different level of interpretation that you approach for words and it's very meaningful. For your time, interest, and continual support–thank you.
i sympathize, it's a recurring struggle with art forms and today.
i guess it was unexpected as we are in the "creative arts" category where we seemingly get to take advantage of our free and independent studies
Far more than 0, Angela!The antique Samurai, I have read, kept the thought of death constantly before them to keep their spirit and body keen–so maybe you are following an old but tried technique for aware living–even in your dreams. A long life is valuable, I think, because one has time to put things together and to see how generations live and die.
"The antique Samurai, I have read, kept the thought of death constantly before them to keep their spirit and body keen."I'll share this with many. Thank you for your bits of wisdom, Thomas.
I was going to say what Cheikh said. Interesting stuff.
The hands on its face cannot erase the moments.These are the intrical whispers that remind you that the machine has no place to hide.You are the perfect machine. Eliminate the competition – ignore their rhymic pulses.Darkness paints your seclusions. The light is your easel.